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Monday, June 29, 2009

Liberal Studies


We were told to choose our Liberal studies course today for the next academic year. One of the new courses they provided is the cooking course, and I think it would be very useful for me, knowing that I tend to be picky when it comes to food so why not make my own food? Who knows? Maybe I could be a great chef like chef Wan. So, I've decided to take cookery.

For some people out there, they think cooking are for pussies. They think cooking is a 'girl thing', and men who cook are gay, well do you wanna know what I think of you sexist bastards? This:

yeah, you've said it chefy


...

and

..

I MISS HER =)

Thursday, June 25, 2009

I'm hot


No, I am not hot (or am I? *wink*), I just feel hot. It is summer time in good ol’ UK, and summer is the period when the sun releases a hell lot of UV radiation down to earth and says “Burn motherfuckas!” I am one of the victims of summer’s intense heat. Especially in my room, things get pretty hot in my room (Haha! Doesn’t that sound dirty to you?), and the one thing that keeps me from hyperthermia is my window, which I leave wide open to let the cool wind into my room. But that’s not the main point.


guroburu warumingu attakku!! (global warming attack!)


Sometime this week, a kid in my school fell from god-knows-what floor; I’m assuming it is the third because he survived the fall; it can’t be the floors lower than that because then it won’t be much of a fall (I mean, come on? Fall from second floor? Even I can survive that, pfff) and falling from floors higher than the third is a guaranteed death. He made quite a scene; teachers panicking, his friends OMFG-ing and me not there to witness it. Some say he fell on the railing, now that would hurt a whole fuckin’ lot. But again, that’s not the main point.


potential bone breakers

The main point is, because of this incident, the school is now freaking out and putting on safety measures before it is closed down by the government, reason: it is not a ‘safe environment’. What did they do? They put on window restrictors on all of the fuckin’ windows in the school! Even in the boarding house! Even in my room! Even my own fuckin’ window!! I mean, what the hell man? I’m not a kid, I’m 18, I won’t fall out from a window easily. Yeah, now I can’t open my window widely anymore, and this heat is killing me. I swear if I get hyperthermia I’m gonna sue this school, or maybe the window restrictor company, or maybe the sun, whichever the easiest. Now if you excuse me, I need to find a way to detach the fuckin’ window restrictor.



oh, wait till I get the hammer, then you and me are gonna have fun.


Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Legal Age



oh what's this?



for me? why how nice of you


Today
is
my
18TH BIRTHDAY!
Ce~le~brate good times, come on!

Very special thanks for those who greeted me:
(in order of greeting)

Mizi
My syg hime
Hasnan
The Dulwich dudes: Arif, Hafiz. Adib, YungBo & Ali.
My mom
Sir Chin Shaomeng
Nurun
Dfang
Zuhairah
Alif
Nordin
Hafiz Ismail
Firah
Pjah
UNKE
DJim
Shely

I can buy R rated games now! Watch 18+ rated movies! Get a driving license! Go to those 'unknown' places that only adults can go! Let's go to a pub and partay! woohoo!


Thursday, June 18, 2009

Project Revolution

To Yazid: We're gonna watch transformers this Saturday, the blewboys have a bbq party on friday evening.



Monday, June 15, 2009

Saliva solution

Hear me out. This afternoon I was about to do Zuhur prayer, and obviously before that I need to wudhu ( not sure about the spelling), so I did. Just when I was about to wash my foot -which is like the final thing to do in the wudhu act - something undesirable happened..irritating you might call it..I saw an ink mark at the tip of my thumb which I didn't notice before. We all know that -well not 'we', it's for all muslims I mean- in order for your wudhu to be 'accepted', the wudhu water needs to be in contact with the parts that need wudhu-ing ( need to find a better word than this), and wudhu-ing (I seriously need to replace this with a better word) with a damn ink mark on your thumb hinders your wudhu to be 'accepted' and since your wudhu wasn't 'accepted' your prayer will not be 'accepted' as well. So as a responsible muslim *kirai2*, I need to get rid of the ink mark.


Unfortunately, it wasn't as easy as I expected. I spent around 5 minutes trying to wash the mark off, but the stubborn ink mark just wouldn't disappear. As if it was taunting me, sticking out its tongue, calling me names. I tried everything; water, soap, water and soap, acid (well maybe not acid, that's just extreme), but to no avail. Out of desperation (more like frustration) I spat on my thumb, on the ink mark. I Attempted to wipe the thing off with my saliva and lo and behold it worked. It goatdamn monkeyfuckin' worked, I mean what the hell man? Saliva? The ink mark vanished in just a few rubs with my spit? For a second I thought my saliva has some sort of magical powers, but then reality slapped me at the face; it can't possible, I'm no Jesus.

I then ponder for a while; how come my saliva worked? Why is it more effective in wiping-off ink marks than water and soap combined? Maybe it was divine intervention? No can't be. There must be a scientific reason. Perhaps, it is the contents of saliva and ink that enabled it to do so. Yes. That must be it.

Interested, I went on a quest to the holyland of the internet to find the answer. I typed-in words like "saliva and ink", "saliva can make ink vanish", "how to remove ink", "can saliva remove ink" and "please give me a goatdamn answer" on the google searchbar, and yet again google has disappointed me. One search result came close though. She (I assume it's a she since they're talking about skirts. Sexist? I know, but, reasonable) mentioned something about saliva's effectiveness to remove ink but she doesn't know why.

Driven by curiousity, I searched to find out the contents of ink and the composition of saliva hoping that my normal-but-sometimes-can-be-clever mind can infer something from them. Sadly, due to my limited knowledge on biology and chemistry I can infer nothing more than "what the fuck is this??". Alas, I have resorted to this: I need you, yes YOU, who's probably smarter than me, to help me to find the answer to this question of mine. Just drop something in my c-box. Don't worry, if you are able to find an anwser, you will earn the right to brag "I am probably smarter than Alim", a reward I dare say is better than receiving a nobel prize.

By the way, have anyone seen my stapler? Just when I need it, it's gone.


God works in scientific ways that can't be explained yet.


Thursday, June 11, 2009

ROBOTS IN THE SKY!

WOO!

Finally, AS exams are over.

I never felt so relieved. This academic year is about to end. Woah, time sure flies fast. I remember the first time when I came here..when I first saw London, we (me and scholars of my batch) were in a bus and on our way to Brunei Hall, I sat there on the bus seat looking outside from behind the bus’ window…looking at the gray dull buildings, European houses, pedestrians of unfamiliar skin colour..gazing at them with eyes open wide..and I thought to myself; so this is where I’m gonna spend most of the five years of my life in, I hope I will do well here. I was feeling a bit insecure at the time. But look at me now, all fine and dandy, like a horse running happily in a flower field, bad analogy there but you get the idea.

Changing the subject. Me and my gwans.. Heh, gwans..are going to the cinema next Friday to watch…wait for it…TRANSFORMERS 2!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..this movie is gonna be sooooo freakin awesome..but more importantly, where there’s Transformers there will be..MEGAN FOX!! AHHH!!! I LOV..ehem..I mean there will be Optimus Prime..yeah, Optimus Prime…yeah…..